Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Hello, My Name Is...

It  was $2 Margaritas at Acapulco today


Do you ever get the urge to talk to random strangers about trivial things like the weather? Do you enjoy learning personal information about your coworkers lives? Coworkers you can't really stand to be around? If so, here are a few things you can do to make new friends!

Read a book; Nothing says, "please tell me about your problems" like reading a book or reading the newspaper

Wear headphones; This is the international sign of, "come talke to me." Everyone knows you don't really care about the music you're pretending to listen too. You really just want a friend to talk to.

Be sick!; If you do this one, you're just an attention whore! Being sick at work or when you're out and about is only done by those that LOVE attention! All day long people will talk about you, to you. They'll make comments like, "YOU look terrible" or "YOU should go home" or they'll give you advice you didn't ask for.


Fin


This post was written while on a sarcasm high!

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Drunk is the new Hungry

Stone Cold Sober :(


So this one time, at Big Lots. Well, it didn't start off at Big Lots. The story should have started off, "This one time, at an Italian restaurant, where the beers were inexpensive..."

But anyway...

You know how they say, you shouldn't go grocery shopping on an empty stomach. You shouldn't go to Big Lots, Target or Best Buy after you've been drinking!

I bought a Shake Weight.
I kind of have been using the Shake Weight.
The Shake Weight is kind of working.

I also bought a toothbrush, some KISS pint glasses, some energy drinks and a bag of sand. I'm not sure why I got the bag of sand.